Can I share a story that I’m not real proud of?
As I’m sure you’re aware of by now, the Coronavirus has spread to the U.S. and continues to needle its way into communities and respiratory systems around the country. As a result, people have begun to buy a lot of toilet paper. Toilet paper? Yes. Of all things, toilet paper is a hot item right now. Fears of a 14-day homebound quarantine have us all feeling like we better have a few extra rolls on hand.
I heard about the vanishing toilet paper on the news and decided to buy some at Costco this week as I was grocery shopping. We still have at least 10 rolls at home but I figured it couldn’t hurt to pick up a few more. Sure enough, as I wheeled my cart down the aisle, the toilet paper was dwindling right before my very eyes. I waited patiently in a quasi-line as people stacked their carts high with paper goods. Finally, I picked up one of the last few packs, tossed it in my cart and continued with my shopping as usual.
As I headed towards the check-out, an elderly man with an empty cart passed me. He stopped to ask someone what direction the toilet paper was. My heart sank. I knew there wouldn’t be any more toilet paper left, after all, I got one of the last packages. The Holy Spirit whispered, “Beck, give him your toilet paper.” I thought about it for approximately 2.8 seconds and then proceeded to walk directly toward the checkout line.
The package of toilet paper has remained in the trunk of my car ever since. I can’t bear to look at it. It reminds me of how I put my interests above the needs of another and gave into our current cultural narrative of panic and self-preservation.
Peace Instead of Panic
These are unprecedented times. The fear we feel is not without cause. The threat to our health and wellbeing is legitimate. The Coronavirus is a real thing with real consequences and as a result, our collective Fight-or-Flight response has been activated.
Feelings of fear and panic arise in the midst of uncertainty. If we aren’t sure what is happening, we look to things that give us a sense of stability. One of the primary things we look to in these moments, whether we know it or not, are the social cues others give us. If our neighbors are stocking up like the world is ending, maybe we should too? Do they know something we don’t? Panic begets panic and the next thing we know, we are trying to find space in our pantry for the 20 extra cans of beans we just bought. Doing what others are doing gives us a sense of control in what is otherwise an out-of-control situation.
While we might not know what the future holds, Jesus does. Jesus is not surprised by the Coronavirus. He is pained by the devastation it has caused across the world, but he is not surprised by it. In times like these, it’s wise to take a deep breath and remind ourselves of a few important truths:
- God is still in control of the universe
- He knows all, sees all
- Jesus is with us
- Our lives are in Good Hands
- In Christ, our eternity is secure
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you.
Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.
John 14:27
Stopping to reorient ourselves in Christ gives us the perspective we need in the midst of crisis and confusing times. Whether you are fearing the Coronavirus pandemic or facing a job loss or navigating other problems in your life, God’s heart is that we look to Him for peace and direction instead of the world around us. Had I reflected on any of this before my trip to Costco this week, I probably would have happily surrendered my toilet paper to an old man in need.
A good friend recently said, “God does not call us to stock up.” Instead, He calls us to take stock in His power, peace and provision. When everything feels chaotic and panic starts to rise in your soul, the peace of Christ, one of Jesus’ parting gifts that he gave us, is still yours for the taking. We have access to a supernatural peace that transcends news reports and viruses and empty shelves at the grocery store.
For what it’s worth, I’m keeping that package of toilet paper in the trunk of my car and I’m determined to give it away to people in need – a toilet paper ministry of sorts. Or maybe just an exercise in trusting God’s provision more than my self-preservation.
